In memory of Norris

I was married for 40 years to an unusual, dynamic, funny, thoughtful, intelligent, curious, observant, tolerant, earthy, quiet and mouthy, affectionate, compassionate man. He would be 75 today. He died in December, '05. To say he is missed is an understatement.

Walking with him through at least two years of decline, then a frustrating and unresolved hospital stay, and several weeks of home care before his death, was a journey I never expected to take and had I known about it in advance, my only certainty would be that I couldn't to do it. And yet I did; we did. And we grew closer and learned many lessons together on the way.

It was excruciatingly painful to watch a man of success, strength and dedication, ever so slowly lose his ability to function. He was well known and respected in this community and around Michigan as a journalist of many talents--writer, photographer, editor. He mentored and encouraged countless colleagues and youngsters, finding newspaper articles appropriate to some one's particular field; telling funny stories, often made up, to lighten another's day; listening for long minutes to the tales of a lonely person who called with a nature question, even when he was near deadline. He won over 40 awards for his press photography and in later life focused especially on nature, lifting up the little things most of us miss, delighting in everything from a lady bug to a dragon fly to a blue heron to a teasel bloom.

When he was working, he was totally focused, which didn't always please his spouse. Especially in our younger years, I felt jealous of his passion for journalism, wondering if he had to choose, which of us would win out. As I matured and found my own life and passions, including motherhood, I became more accepting. And, as often happens, as I stopped "pulling on the reins", he grew more willing to include me or defer to my needs. And he taught me to be a bit of a photographer, too.

I hold in my possession his beautiful pictures, reflections of a great and good man--a man who knew many famous people, but was humble enough to willingly do his mother-in-law's laundry the five years she resided in a nursing home; a father who encouraged, challenged and understood his daughter; a man who bought countless books for the children of "his" waitresses, so wanting to help them and their moms in the struggle to grow up and offer their gifts to the world; a man who would bring home a modest bouquet of daffodils for me, just because; a man who never went a day without giving and receiving hugs, kisses, and saying "I love you."

What a special blessing he was to many, but especially to me and our beautiful daughter. And so tonight I celebrate him, our years together, and the great legacy of beauty, generosity, peace and justice he left behind. Thank you, God, for Norris!

Remember to breathe, listen, look, laugh, and love!